You’ve been corresponding back and forth for a while with your hopefully ideal lady or gentleman.  You feel like you know them!  Beware at this stage because you may have a false sense of intimacy from those 67 e-mails….however, you only “know” them on paper or electronically and your correspondent could be different in person.

You would like to meet each other.  Great!  It is okay to set a time and place to meet over the e-mail.  However, it is wise to speak with them by telephone first.  There is still margin for error. (I had one correspondent who had someone else writing his e-mails! Another individual who was taking a long time to answer e-mails was not fluent in English, which was a problem.)

In any case, you’ll feel more comfortable with each other if you speak on the phone, even just for a few minutes.  Don’t be afraid to cancel the date at that point if either of you has any doubts.  You may wish to step back and return to corresponding or you may wish to have telephone dates for a while.  If you have an intuition that something is wrong, or you just don’t want to meet, let the other person know.  Sometimes that person-to-person chemistry that you felt in writing just isn’t there when you talk on the telephone.  Be honest and listen to the other individual’s response.  Your comfort level is important.  Don’t rush the other person into meeting if they are not ready and also don’t let them rush you.